Dog Tags To My Heart
by JMLHCPKSfan
Summary: It's Logan's birthday and he can't believe his boyfriend, James, forgot to call him from his military base. However, James never disappoints, and shows up to give Logan the best birthday he could imagine.


**Hey, guys! :D Just a little one-shot, because, let's be honest, army James would be beyond sexy. :) If you don't live in America, it's okay, I don't understand American military, either. And if some of my lovely readers know stuff about the army, I don't, but I think I was vague enough to pass. ;D I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

I guess I shouldn't be upset that James had forgotten to even call me on my birthday. He was a billion miles away at his base camp, busy with a thousand other things. Of course he wouldn't be worried about Logie's birthday.

But I didn't think I was in the wrong for being just a little upset. He called on Valentine's Day and our two- year anniversary and a few times a week, why couldn't he remember this simple day? Maybe he had, but something came up and he didn't have the time to call. Maybe he would call tonight.

I missed James like crazy. He was in the army and I hadn't seen him for months- not since he left after his Christmas leave, which wasn't too long ago, but I still missed him. I got to hear his voice occasionally on the phone and he wrote me a few long letters of stuff he didn't want to waste his time talking about on the phone. I guess I sort of knew what I was getting into when he went off to the army- he told me that it would be best for me to break up with him before I had to go through all of this, but I couldn't.

My birthday had never been a big deal, and even now I was just sitting on the couch watching "Friends" and eating a cake that my best friend, Carlos, made for me.

I stared at my phone screen, admiring the photo that I had brought up.

It was taken at Christmas- the airport, where his best friend, Kendall, and I had greeted him.

Kendall had somehow captured the exact moment that we were reunited. James had dropped his pack and caught me in a hug. I was swept off of my feet, our lips pressed together, my feet off the ground. That was one of my favorite memories. Unfortunately, it was soon followed by a less jubilant kiss goodbye.

The picture was overcome by a call screen as the phone buzzed.

_Jamie_

My heart exploded and I tried to compose myself as I hit answer. I knew he wouldn't forget.

"Hey, you," I said excitedly, muting the TV. I expected a big "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" or something, but instead I got a calm answer.

"Hi, sweet-cheeks, what's up?"

"Nothing much," I said, waiting on him to say anything about today being special.

"Yeah? How was dinner with Carlitos the other day?"

"Um… It was good."

"What's wrong? You seem sad or something."

I was torn. Of course I wanted my boyfriend to wish me a happy birthday, but if I told him, he would feel bad for forgetting and he had other things to worry about.

"I'm fine," I said. "So what are you doing?"

"Oh, nothing," he sang. "Just standing out in the snow."

"Snow? Over there?" I asked in surprise. "That's crazy."

"Yeah, it IS crazy. Is it snowing there?"

"Yeah."

"Are you sure?"

"It's Minnesota, baby, of course it's snowing."

"But do you know for a fact?"

"What does it matter?" I laughed.

"Go check."

"James!"

"Pleeease? I love you!"

"I'm not gonna check. I know it's snowing," I said matter-of-factly.

"How much?"

"What?"

"Is it like a blizzard? Or a dusting?"

"James, you're being stupid," I laughed.

"Go stand out in the snow, so it's like we're together."

"It's negative degrees."

"Please? I miss you. Just like go out on the porch. Or look out the window."

"WHY?"

"Please?"

I rolled my eyes, heaving myself off of the couch and going to the front window.

"Okay, I'm looking out the-" I began, but stopped when I saw someone standing out in the yard. It took me a second to register the face, the camouflage, the grin, and as soon as I realized that it was him out there, my body pretty much exploded with excitement and emotion.

"Come out here and give me a birthday hug," James said over the phone, his lips matching the words I heard.

I practically dropped the phone, jerking the door opened and leaping outside, my heart racing. I didn't much care that I was in my pajamas without so much as socks on- I just needed to get to James- to touch him, make sure he's real.

"Where are your shoes?" James laughed, but I was too busy tackling him to care about my freezing feet.

His impossibly strong arms wrapped around my waist, making my throat tighten and a whimper escape. He was real. 100 percent man. He lifted me off of my feet, probably so they wouldn't freeze, and I wrapped my legs around his camouflage waist. I couldn't seem to get close enough. I just wanted to attach myself to him.

I breathed in his smell- his natural smell that sent my head spinning. He felt so good in my arms. I had lay in bed a few times, imagining him in my arms, but that didn't compare to this.

"You're here," I sobbed. I felt stupid, but every time he came home I cried like a baby and he didn't shed a tear. I guess he's a tough army man- and they don't cry, right? I knew he felt the same as me, though, his face turned inward as he inhaled my smell, too, his arms basically crushing me.

"Happy birthday, handsome," James said charismatically. "I bet you thought I forgot."

"I did," I choked.

"Can I have kisses?"

"You can have all the kisses," I laughed a little, pulling away to kiss his face, then his lips. "I missed you."

"I missed YOU."

"How're you here?"

"I worked some James magic," he smirked. "Let's go in- you don't even have a coat on."

I held him tightly, smelling him, feeling him, as he carried me into our house. I knew he carried things that were more than twice my weight daily, and carrying ME was nothing to him.

He set me on the counter in the kitchen as he took off his "Diamond U.S. Army" camo jacket and sat it on the table, leaving him in a tight, tucked-in shirt that showed his muscles. I have to admit, I find that uniform extremely sexy.

"Were you surprised?" he asked, coming up to stand between my legs.

"Yeah? I THOUGHT it was fishy that you were standing in the snow," I laughed, hugging his neck.

"The look on your face… I wish I had a picture. I never wanna forget the intensity of these times, you know?" James said sweetly. "Sometimes I lie at base and just close my eyes and think about that time at the airport- reunions are so happy."

"But the goodbyes are the worst," I said quietly.

"I'm here now," James said finally, backing away to look up at me. "What do you wanna do, birthday boy?"

"I just wanna hug you and make sure you're real," I laughed pitifully.

"And after that?"

"Is it bad that I really just wanna lie in bed and watch a movie with you?" I laughed.

"You know, after a long day of travelling, that sounds just about perfect," he smiled. "That's what I love about you, Logie, you find happiness in such simple things."

* * *

James changed into a pair of his old pajamas, saying that it was weird to be wearing such soft material. I swear he must have had an orgasm when his body hit our bed, too.

I can't explain what it was like to be able to cuddle him for once in that bed. The movie was forgotten about, really, as we just lay there, holding one another. I could tell he missed me just as much as I missed him, by the way he told me about the times he lay in his cot at base and just think about me being beside him, telling him some story about my day. I knew it could be miserable at his base, and I hated that all he had for comfort was thinking about me.

After a while, he stopped responding and I heard him start to snore lightly. I wanted to talk to him forever, but I knew that his sleep clock was out of whack and he had been travelling all day, so he was exhausted.

No matter. I enjoyed just laying there, the movie sounding in the background, his strong arms around me, smelling that scent that drove me insane.

After a while, I was lulled to sleep, too.

* * *

I was awakened by someone stroking my cheek and hair. Disoriented and forgetting that James was home, I figured it was Carlos, because he had a key to our house and sometimes did stupid stuff like that.

"Los, go home," I grumbled, burying my face in the pillow.

"Is there something you need to tell me about you and Carlos?" James giggled, bringing everything back to me. I chuckled and pulled him closer to me, cuddling my face sleepily into his chest.

"No, you know how he is," I said quietly. "Kendall's the exact same way with you."

James laughed a little, stroking the back of my head. I listened to his heart through the pulse in his bicep. It seemed to beat so slowly, so strongly.

"Maybe we should get up before we sleep your birthday away," he said softly.

"We have forever," I mumbled.

"Not so much."

My heart shattered with the remembrance of James having to leave.

"When?" I asked.

"Tomorrow afternoon," he said softly.

"I don't want you to go."

"And I don't wanna go," he murmured. "But I promised the country I would."

Suddenly I felt panicked. Of course I was grateful that he was here, even if it was just for a day. But… It was torture to have so little time with him before having to say goodbye. It seemed like a waste. I didn't want him to go because I would miss him and it was dangerous there. Every day I fear getting a call from Mrs. Diamond, saying that they called and told her that James had passed because of a landmine explosion or something.

"Don't cry," he said softly, knowing that I was sure trying. "No tears on your birthday."

When he lifted my chin to look at him, I saw that he was almost crying, too. He smiled a little before kissing me, trying to melt my worries but not succeeding.

"What do you want for dinner, my love?" he asked sweetly.

"Can we go to our place?"

* * *

"Oh, Jesus, I haven't had this pizza in…" James drifted off, chomping hungrily at his pizza. I grinned from across the pizzeria booth, loving giving him old pleasures.

This old, run-down pizzeria was OUR place. Where I took him for our first date, where he fell in love with the food. This is where we went for dates, for long talks, for everything. He took me here to tell me that he had been called to duty and had to leave the next month. Last he was here, for Christmas, we hadn't gotten the time to come here together. This booth in particular had such happy memories along with the worst, angriest, saddest memories.

"Didn't know I was craving it till I smelled it," James smirked over a mouthful.

"You're a mess," I laughed.

After we ate, we decided to take a little walk in the snow before we went back to our car. It felt good to hold his hand again, even if it was freezing.

"I hate to leave all this behind," James sighed as we walked slowly, just admiring the light sprinkles of snow coming down from the dark sky. "I miss it so bad… I miss YOU so bad."

I smiled up at him, knowing that he didn't need a response.

"Sometimes I get scared," he said softly, looking down at the sidewalk. "Like when we have to transport. I get really afraid that I'm gonna step on a landmine or something… As a kid, you know, Kendall and I would play army guys and act like we're shooting each other or throwing grenades…" he paused, looking over at me. "But now it's real. And it's scary as shit. Sometimes… I just imagine you crying in bed, with my dog tag in your hands… And…"

I looked away, feeling myself getting worked up, too.

James stopped talking for a while as we walked.

"I guess it's not proper birthday talk, is it?" he laughed finally.

"But we have to talk about it," I admitted. "It's reality."

James was silent for a while longer before stopping abruptly and pulling me close in the middle of the sidewalk.

"I love you, Loge," he said, almost desperately.

"I… Love you, too," I murmured, puzzled.

"A lot?"

"What's this about?"

"A lot of my buddies proposed to their girlfriends before they were shipped off after Christmas," James said. "And come to find out, they're getting married when they go back home for their Thanksgiving leave, or even earlier."

"Okay?"

"And it's because when you're married to a soldier, you get awesome benefits. Like- health benefits and stuff. And if the guy dies, you still have all that, plus money for a funeral and stuff. And when you're an army guy, you want to get married ASAP because you never know when you might go, you know? And you wanna leave her with those benefits."

Suddenly I got it. Was he trying to propose to me? My heart fluttered and I squeezed his hand, telling him that I was getting it.

I felt my heart hammering in my throat, watching his hazel eyes bear into mine nervously. Gosh, he was even sexy when he was fumbling with words.

"And I mean, we've never really talked about getting married, but I don't wanna leave you helpless if I die, you know?"

"James?"

"Yes, baby?"

"What are you saying?"

James sighed, looking around nervously. Honestly, this was entertaining me through my own nerves.

"Um… I'm saying that I love you, and- and, um-" James' hand darted into his pocket and fished around. "And I wasn't planning on this, and I don't have a ring or anything, but I have this," he paused and hurriedly dropped to his knee. His hand opened to show a dog tag with a long chain. "But I- um… I-"

I watched him expectantly and he laughed a little and cleared his throat.

"Logie, will you marry me?" he asked.

I wanted to laugh, cry, throw up, and pass out all at the same time.

I realized that my absence for words may have come across as contemplating how to let him down easy when his nervous smile started to fade.

"W-well?" he asked.

"Yeah. Yes!" I laughed, and he sprang up, lifting me from my feet in a hug.

* * *

James was in the shower that night when I picked up with camouflage jacket. The long dog tag with his name on it rattled around my neck, the tags resting on my sternum. I knew it was an old one- he was issued a new set recently- and I thought it was an adorable "engagement ring".

The jacket was really big and made of rough material. My thumb ran over his name tag with "Diamond" stitched into it.

I put the huge jacket on, smelling the collar which held that James scent. I tried imagining my new fiancé wearing it, a hard helmet on his head and big gun in his hands. I didn't know whether I hated that thought or found it extremely sexy.

"God, that's hot," I heard James groan, coming with his footsteps entering the room. "I don't think you understand how many times I've imagined this moment."

I turned to him as he approached in only a white towel around his waist. He had gotten even more ripped than last time I saw his body- it seemed impossible.

"That's sexy as all hell," he murmured, making me bite my lip flirtatiously. "That right there. Can I have like a picture of you doing that?"

I laughed, making him grin and giggle.

"You have no idea," James said quietly, kissing my neck. "How horny I get, surrounded by attractive men, seeing their junk and EVERYTHING, missing my Boo, having been abstinent for months at a time. It's horrible."

"Poor baby," I giggled loving his warm lips on my skin. He knew just where to touch to drive me nuts, and currently he was circling one of them just to make me crazy.

"But you will NEVER have one of these jackets of your own," he said softly. "I never want to see you in the whole uniform. You're too cute and too innocent for what comes with it."

"Shh," I hushed, turning my head to catch his lips with mine. I didn't want him to get sentimental on me when it was getting heated. "Let's not sleep tonight."

* * *

"Please don't cry," James pleaded softly. "If you cry, I'll cry, and I can't be crying in this uniform, you know?"

"I'm trying," I said pitifully. "But… It's hard."

"I know, baby," he sighed, taking me into his arms. We only had a few minutes to say goodbye, considering we had ended up falling asleep in the early morning and woke up late. "Kendall and Mom are gonna be mad that I didn't tell them I was home."

"I'm happy I didn't have to share," I admitted, arms tight around his torso. We hugged in silence for a long time before he spoke.

"So do you think we can have a little shindig planned by May?" he asked.

"May? Jesus, Jame, that's in a few months away! How do I plan a whole wedding in a few months?"

"I told you I want this to happen ASAP. It doesn't have to be fancy- we can just dress nice and go to a church with our Mommies and Daddies and Carlos and Kendall there and be done," he compromised.

"No way! This is gonna be extravagant. Somehow." I really had no clue how I could plan what I had pictured in my mind in just a few months. I wanted pretty flowers, the bridal party all dressed the same, a big cake and awesome meal, the best reception area possible. I knew that his mom, Brooke, liked to help plan weddings, and she would take care of a lot of this.

"Okay. Well we can talk about it on the phone," he said happily. That tone reminded me that I wouldn't be able to feel him hug me, hear him laugh into the same air I stood in, or taste his lips until our wedding day in May. My arms tightened around him as his flight was called to board, but he made no move to go.

We hugged for a while later before he let go of me.

"Do you have my tags?" he asked. I nodded sadly, holding up the dog tags. He smiled a little and took them, pressing his lips to both. "I'll eventually get you a ring, I swear," he grinned.

"I like this for now," I choked, letting my tears out. James sighed, hearing his flight be called again.

"I hate to leave you," he murmured. "But in May, I'll get a whole week home. Maybe even more, so we can relax and honeymoon. Okay?"

I nodded sadly and he kissed my cheek softly.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too."

He let the dog tags drop from his hand so they would fall back to my chest as he kissed my lips.

"You better hurry before you miss your flight," I said softly. He gave me a final kiss before hurrying off with his big camouflage backpack.

All I could think was that now I was crying hysterically, and in just a few months I would be standing here, doing the same thing, my heart fluttering as I waited on my soon-to-be-husband to come into view. I already couldn't wait.

* * *

**See? Wasn't that sweet? :) I loved writing this, and I'm probably gonna write another army one, except probably a really sad one. It might even be an addition to this one. Anyway, even if nobody reads this one, I love it enough to where I'm gonna keep reading it over and over anyway. :D**


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